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Grace

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Monday, July 19th 2010, 11:21am

Napping/routine - again

Yes it's me again and yes it's on the subject of napping - again.

I would have restarted one of my old threads but I figured people would probably die of boredom reading it before they got to the end :)

OK I don't understand, J is nearly 8 months old and we STILL have the same problem napping and it's driving me mad. So his routine is he sleeps from 6pm to about 6am, he's awake and has brekkie until 8am when he has a nap of 30 mins (plus 15 mins crying before he goes to sleep), from 8:45 to about 9:30 he plays and then it's back for another 30 minute nap (plus about 20 mins crying before sleeping), 10:20 to 12:30 he plays, has his lunch and grumps regularly as he's tired but not tired enough to nap, at 12:30 we have another nap (queue another 20 mins crying first), he then goes until between 2 and 3 before needing another nap but this one he usually won't take unless I take him into my bed and bf him to sleep (although sometimes miracles happen - yesterday he went down without crying in his own bed and slept for 2 hours and got me all excited that he was going to do it again - he didn't). I try to keep him down for a double nap at this point, usually bfding him back to sleep as he has to go until 6pm before bed

Now I thought it was normal for babies to fight every single nap during the day but having spoken to other mums at the post natal group it seems that they put their LOs down and they just drift peacefully off so now I'm wondering what I'm doing wrong that J goes to sleep kicking and screaming all the way - yet when he goes down at night he's an angel and sends himself to sleep no problem. The HV suggested it was because he hadn't learned how to send himself to sleep but I know he can because he does it all night and very occasionally he'll do it during the day too it's not a question of he can't go tot sleep it's a question that he doesn't WANT to go to sleep but he is also too tired to stay up all day. He puts himself back to sleep at night if he wakes no problem but refuses to do so during the day.

I just don't get it, why doesn't he want to sleep? I have tried pre-empting his tiredness and taking him up early for a wind down routine prior to napping and I've tried waiting until he's wailing with tiredness (and everything in between) and the end result is always the same, as soon as he recognises that I'm starting the naptime routine he starts to wail like a banshee. I have changed my routine a number of times and each time the new routine will work for a week until he starts to recognise it and then we're back to banshee wailing again. It makes no difference if I stay in the bedroom with him or if I go and sit in the room next door, he still wails.

Anyone got any ideas cos I'm all out - and I'm knackered - he's so much fun when he's well rested but he's not fun when he's tired.


ICSI BFP DS1 born Nov 09
Natural BFP DS2 born Sept 11

JENSQUI

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Monday, July 19th 2010, 11:27am

have you tried putting something in the cot for him to play with? When M is being a little monkey and battling to stay awake I put one of her cuddly rattle toys in the cot, stick the projector/lullaby thing on her mobile on and leave her. After about 10 mins I go in and find her asleep.
x


me 38, DP 44, ttc since 2005
BFP May 07 - HB seen @ 8 wks but CRL only 7 weeks, m/c @ 9 wks
BFP Jan 08 -m/c @ 11 wks (D&C)
BFP Jun 08 - early loss
BFP Dec 08 - HB & CRL ok @ 8 wks, but sac too small, m/c @ 9 wks
BFP Apr 09 - Martha born 9th Jan 2010
BFP Feb 12 - Eliza born 13th Oct 2012

Grace

Princess of the Universe

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Monday, July 19th 2010, 12:17pm

Hi Jen,

Yes that was the latest routine, he got a teddy and then a rattly thing when teddy didn't work and I put on his Winnie the Pooh light display. At first it worked and he would play with them for 10 mins before getting cross and I would turn off the light display and he would go to sleep after 5 minutes of making irritated noises but not actually crying, however, now as soon as you lie him down he makes irritable noises building up to wailing like a banshee, if you give him a toy he gets distracted by it for a few seconds before realising what you're trying to do and getting really cross. I don't get it because sometimes he wakes up at 5am and I will hear him playing with his feet for 10 minutes before he goes back to sleep so why doesn't he do it during the day!


ICSI BFP DS1 born Nov 09
Natural BFP DS2 born Sept 11

JENSQUI

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Monday, July 19th 2010, 12:48pm

M does this sometimes too and I find the only way she will then sleep is to 'nag' on my clean little pinkie for a while - something she never really did when younger. Whilst I don;t think that her teeth will come through soon it does seem that sometimes her gums are bothering her and, like any kind of pain, she probably feels it most when not distracted by anything else and is tired. Rather than sucking on my finger she seems to roll it around her mouth and even directs it to the sides with her hands, like she is getting relief from that. Of course, I am probably just inventing a reason for her not sleeping and she is just being a pain in the bum to keep me on my toes!


me 38, DP 44, ttc since 2005
BFP May 07 - HB seen @ 8 wks but CRL only 7 weeks, m/c @ 9 wks
BFP Jan 08 -m/c @ 11 wks (D&C)
BFP Jun 08 - early loss
BFP Dec 08 - HB & CRL ok @ 8 wks, but sac too small, m/c @ 9 wks
BFP Apr 09 - Martha born 9th Jan 2010
BFP Feb 12 - Eliza born 13th Oct 2012

Flic

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Monday, July 19th 2010, 1:36pm

Hmmmm, O doesn't nap too much to a schedule during the day. She has a nap after her morning feed for about 15 - 20 minutes and then when I see he getting tired I put her in her bouncy chair or on the floor.

Sometimes she fights it (like she is now!) and has a shout and a moan but then eventually drops off to sleep. She realy fights her sleep when there are people here and she's too busy having a neb and doesn't want to miss anything.

Sorry Grace, I don't know what to suggest but just wanted to let you know that J isn't the only one who doesn't want to sleep.






Our miracle was born on 25.02.2010!!



Grace

Princess of the Universe

  • "Grace" started this thread
  • United Kingdom

Posts: 3,405

Reg: Jul 29th 2008

Location: Berkshire

Children: 1 beautiful little son conceived through ICSI and one equally beautiful little boy concieved naturally!

What's Up?
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6

Monday, July 19th 2010, 1:48pm

They sure do like to keep you on your toes don't they Jen :) J likes to chew my finger too (always has) but he's now got 2 teeth on the bottom and it REALLY hurts so he doesn't get to chew my finger any more, mind you he didn't ever really chew it before sleeping he just used to like chewing it.

The thing is yesterday DH put him down and he went down without a noise and slept for 2 hours, yet I've duplicated everything dh did and he still wailed until he finally went to sleep and I bet he wakes up again 30 mins to the second he was put down. If DH does it again this weekend he can stay at home and I'll go to work, I mean how hard can his job be!


ICSI BFP DS1 born Nov 09
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Flic

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Monday, July 19th 2010, 1:52pm

Grace, just a thought, could it be that J doesn't want to 'leave' you??!!






Our miracle was born on 25.02.2010!!



Grace

Princess of the Universe

  • "Grace" started this thread
  • United Kingdom

Posts: 3,405

Reg: Jul 29th 2008

Location: Berkshire

Children: 1 beautiful little son conceived through ICSI and one equally beautiful little boy concieved naturally!

What's Up?
Oh god I've got Puppies!

Thanks: 29 / 2

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Monday, July 19th 2010, 2:00pm

Nah he wails if I'm there as well, I even try lying next to him and he wails unless I bf him to sleep which I don't want to get into the habit of.


ICSI BFP DS1 born Nov 09
Natural BFP DS2 born Sept 11

JENSQUI

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Monday, July 19th 2010, 2:01pm

don;t worry Grace, Al has the 'magic' touch too. M usually wakes around 7am and wants milk. So I feed her in bed and sometimes she still seems a bit tired. I lay her down next to me and she kicks wildly, punching me in the face. If I lay her next to Al she somehow seems soothed and falls asleep within minutes. Why does she never do that with me?


me 38, DP 44, ttc since 2005
BFP May 07 - HB seen @ 8 wks but CRL only 7 weeks, m/c @ 9 wks
BFP Jan 08 -m/c @ 11 wks (D&C)
BFP Jun 08 - early loss
BFP Dec 08 - HB & CRL ok @ 8 wks, but sac too small, m/c @ 9 wks
BFP Apr 09 - Martha born 9th Jan 2010
BFP Feb 12 - Eliza born 13th Oct 2012

Jessica

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Monday, July 19th 2010, 10:05pm

Hi Grace,

I'm replying on my DH's phone so sorry for the typing / brevity!

I had big probs getting Lucas to nap too though he was able to put himself to sleep at night-time. In January he would cry for so long it would be time for his next nap, almost. I got lots of advice, none of which worked. :sadface: In the end I started bfing him to sleep ... And it worked. He started having really good long naps, I started getting a rest/ doing my chores and feeling human again.

I did worry about what I was letting myself infor, but nowadays I find L can self settle at nap time and still do the long sleep. As he's got older he's just got it sorted in his head, I think.

Completely understand if you don't fancy starting doing that. Just wanted to say it worked ok for us and doesn't seem to be about to turn into a long term issue.

Good luck, and I hope you can crack it soon.
Kitty
xx

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Tuesday, July 20th 2010, 8:11am

I really feel for you Grace, it's never easy when they fight their sleep, we never had a problem with Will at night but he hated missing anything during the day. By 8 months he only had 2 naps a day for about an hour each and that seemed to be enough to not affect his nighttime routine, he only has 1 nap of 1.5 hrs now. I just went with him, if he was tired and refused to sleep we would go out for walk or a drive which did the trick, I knew it wasn't ideal and was probably setting myself up for future problems but as he got older he has got a lot better and settles himself when he is ready.

What I am trying to say is that there is light at the end of the tunnel and it will get better, I promise.

blowkiss


IVF #1 2008 :BFP: William born 15/2/09
Our 6 yr TTC journey WAS over
Shocking natural :BFP: Charlotte born 10/9/11
:happy: Our family is now complete :happy:






Grace

Princess of the Universe

  • "Grace" started this thread
  • United Kingdom

Posts: 3,405

Reg: Jul 29th 2008

Location: Berkshire

Children: 1 beautiful little son conceived through ICSI and one equally beautiful little boy concieved naturally!

What's Up?
Oh god I've got Puppies!

Thanks: 29 / 2

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12

Tuesday, July 20th 2010, 8:16am

Thanks Jessica,

I do try that with J sometimes (at times when it's really important that he takes his nap at a certain time) but even then it's hit and miss and he still only sleeps for 30 minutes before waking up again AND if I try to get up and leave him there he wakes instantly so I have to stay with him. It's quite nice to do it sometimes as I can then catch 40 winks at the same time but it's not practical for every nap as I have stuff that I need to do (like make his meals).

It's good to know that it's not just us that have problems as to listen to everyone at the postnatal group you'd think I was the only one in the world. I know his father was exactly the same as his mother is constantly telling me but she didn't have a solution either! I think if you, Flic and I came up with a solution we could make a fortune selling it :)

I know what you mean Jen, J shows much more enjoyment at the sight of his daddy than he does to me, I know it's because he sees me more and probably takes it for granted that I'll always be there so he doesn't need to be so nice to me! Dh got the first smile and I bet he gets his name first too. Still when J toppled over at the weekend and banged his head, while under the supervision of DH, it was mummy he wanted to make it better!


ICSI BFP DS1 born Nov 09
Natural BFP DS2 born Sept 11

Grace

Princess of the Universe

  • "Grace" started this thread
  • United Kingdom

Posts: 3,405

Reg: Jul 29th 2008

Location: Berkshire

Children: 1 beautiful little son conceived through ICSI and one equally beautiful little boy concieved naturally!

What's Up?
Oh god I've got Puppies!

Thanks: 29 / 2

  • Send private message

13

Tuesday, July 20th 2010, 8:18am

Thanks Ali Bird, I do hope there's light at the end of the tunnel as J needs 4-5 naps a day to keep him happy and fighting for each one every day is exhausting.


ICSI BFP DS1 born Nov 09
Natural BFP DS2 born Sept 11




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