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  • "aramass" started this thread

Posts: 1,026

Reg: May 9th 2009

Location: London

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1

Saturday, February 19th 2011, 12:33pm

Routines. Advice needed please.

Hello everyone

My twin girls are now exactly a month old today. My scrambled, sleep deprived head can't fix my ticker though!

I'd love advice about routines. For the last month everything has been on demand and we haven't had any routine at all except I've tried implementing bath time this week and putting them to bed in the evenings in their bedroom so that they can begin to differentiate between night and day.

I'm not breast feeding but am expressing/formula feeding so it's been quite tough. Genevieve is a good feeder, she's very windy but if I wind her enough she'll go straight back to sleep during the night. Maggie is a very slow feeder. She falls asleep on the job so I put her back to bed and then she screams. Yesterday's midnight feed lasted 3 and a half hours with a half hour break before the next one! Sometimes they are in synch, sometimes they aren't. I can't decide which is better/worse.

They tend to sleep really well in the morning and I am guilty of letting them sleep too much then so I can catch some sleep and I think this has an impact on the night times. They sleep a lot during the day and then cluster feed frantically in the evening when sometimes I will be feeding them for 5 hours.

I hope I'm making sense. Basically I am craving a routine of some sorts and would love them to go for longer during feeds during the night as this feeding on demand is a killer, although I realise they are still very young and I am going to be at their mercy for a while yet! Also, any advice on getting Maggie to drink a bit more quickly without giving her wind would be great too as this is part of the problem.

Thank you!
Me: 37 Him: 42
Unexplained
IVF May 2010
:BFP: 10th June.
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Ros

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Reg: Mar 14th 2008

Children: twin girls thanks to PGD!

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Saturday, February 19th 2011, 1:08pm

Hi Aramass, I think you are doing brilliantly. Well done for getting through the first month, and it's great that you have started bathtime and bedtime. It took us a while to get that sorted out as by that time of the day you are so shattered and wondering how many time you'll be up that night.
We didn't have much of a routine for the first month as the babies were so tiny that they needed food so frequently - but they did start to show a regularity with feed times and the cluster feeding in the evening (I think that is normal) so I tried to adjust it so I knew what was happening. It is worth feeding as much as possible in the evening to see how long they can go at night.
Have you noticed any regularity with feeding times of yours? Perhaps you could write down times and quantities takes for a few days and see if there is a pattern which you hadn't noticed (easy to miss when you are sleep deprived).
I assume your girls are putting on weight nicely now so you can get some control over the situation. After working out if there are any standard feed times, how about trying to stick to those for a few days, it doesn't matter if you are half an hour early or late with them, but that may just get you into a system so you know where you are and the babies will start to learn it too. They are small, and I know the difficulties of one feeding better/quicker than the other, but you need to do anything you can to help yourself.
I stopped waking mine at night for food when I realised they could actually go 4 or 5 hours, that was amazing as there were fewer night time feeds and I felt a whole lot better. Don't expect things to change overnight, but little by little you will get there and by the time the Spring sunshine comes out in a few weeks, you'll be feeling in control and more awake again.
I think Ive waffed quite alot, sorry. Hope I've helped a little. I promise it does get easier, it just takes time. As they grow they can last longer.
Good luckx

After 5 years of endo surgery, clomid, 2 x MM/C, 2 x ICSI cycles and 1 PGD cycle,
beautiful twin girls born 8th Feb 2010, we are so grateful

This post has been edited 1 times, last edit by "Ros" (Feb 19th 2011, 1:11pm)


csam

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Saturday, February 19th 2011, 1:32pm

Hiya

I didn't really get mine into a routine until they were 10 weeks old.

I started by doing regular 4 hour feeds 6am,10am,2pm,6pm then a dream feed(10pm) and a night feed (although they slept through from 13 weeks).This really worked for me as I knew what time I had inbetween to sort out my then 2 year old.My Dh did every night feed with me which really helped.My friend whose twins were born on the same day followed this routine also and her slept through about the same time.



Sleep times at that age were inbetween feed times,eg 7am,12pm,3pm. If one woke first I'd wake the other shortly after,so that they were 'synched',I don't tend to do it now tho as DS needs/wants more sleep and DD often prefers 3 shorter naps.At the age yours are I personally don't think they can sleep too much,in my experience with all my 3 children,sleep breeds sleep.

I also put them to bed at 7pm every evening. but never really did the bath/bottle/bed routine as 5pm onwards is busy with my other DD and Dh often isn't in until after 6 (and it takes me too long to bath all 3 on my own!).



When I just had my DD I did what Ros said,I followed a routine but I followed her que's,I had to 'impose' a bit more of a routine on my twinnies but actually it turns out it's it's the same routine as I did with my DD1.



Mine were very slow feeders also and aren't really fussed by their milk now.



You will get lots of advice/opinions so I guess you need to see what works best for you and Dh and the girls.



Take care

xxxx
[zx076] BEAUTIFUL 4 YEAR OLD DAUGHTER [zx076]




This post has been edited 1 times, last edit by "csam" (Feb 19th 2011, 1:35pm)


Posts: 435

Reg: Mar 17th 2008

Location: Manchester

Children: Twins!

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4

Monday, February 21st 2011, 9:39pm

We didn't have much of a routine for the first 6-8 weeks while I was still mixed feeding because it was hard to tell how much or how little they had fed, even though they were taking formula as well, so it was pretty much everything on demand, feeding, napping, sleeping and the very short playtime stints. They were really windy, so it was a constant drill of breast-bottle-wind-nap over and over again.

I gave up breastfeeding at 8 weeks and that was when we started implementing some form of routine. We fed them every 3 hours to start with, so it was 12am, 3am, 6am, 9am, 12pm, 3pm, 6pm, 9pm..... following the eat-activity-sleep rota, letting them nap on their bouncy chairs during the day and sleeping in cot at night. Then with time, they dropped the 12 am feed after we gave them a big feed at 10pm instead of 9pm and stretched the nights gradually longer (let them wake of their own accord) and we finally moved to 7am, 10am, 1pm, 4pm, 7pm, 10pm until they started weaning.

Now at 6 months, we do 7am (milk & porridge), 11am (lunch), 2pm (milk), 5pm (dinner) and 7:30pm (milk).

Mine were (and still are) big morning sleepers. If it fits in with your own routines, then it's not a bad thing. Even now, they go straight back to sleep after breakfast and don't wake up until 10am to watch CBeebies on BBC2 before lunch. They they have a nap at half 12 and a nap at 3pm. 8am to 10am is when I get my best sleep too as they wake me up a few times during the night for dummies or just for a moan.

Apart from the weaning schedule, we didn't really impose anything too strictly on them and just let them tell us when they wanted to change. We tried it once and it backfired (they stopped feeding properly), so we went back to what they were happy with and it was better then. We also didn't bother bathing them every night either.

Good luck and well done for getting through the first month!! I didn't believe it at the time, but it DOES get better!!
:)
* Emma * :smile:
TTC 8 yrs PCOS - Clomidx10 - IVFx3
Nov 2009 Last try: Short protocol ICSI - wonderful BFP!!! -
TWINS!!
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  • "bouncytigger" is no longer a member of FZ

Posts: 6,782

Reg: Mar 9th 2008

Location: 100 Acre Wood

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Tuesday, February 22nd 2011, 11:43am

i went with the babies until about 7 weeks, then we starting doing feeding every three and a half hours..starting at 7am and ending at 9pm and then just fed as babies wanted in the night, though always woke the second if they weren't already awake.. now on four hours feeding, beginning at 7am, last feed at 7pm and again just go with the babies during the night and length of sleep is slowly stretching out.. tried a dream feed, but didn't work for us..

Re slow feeding, we changed teats to medium flow quite early with little boy as he took ages to feed.. and that made a massive difference, though could result in them drinking too fast and vomiting. so just keep an eye if you do that..

It does get better.. a few weeks ago, I though it wouldn't, but starting the set feeding has made a massive difference for us.

Hope you and gorgeous girlies are ok

blowkiss
ICSI number 5 - BFP!! :boy: :girl: arrived December 2010

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Location: Norwich

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Tuesday, March 1st 2011, 6:09pm

Hi Aramass

Our twins have been home just over 2weeks now and we were kind of spoilt as they were in a 4hourly routine when they came home out of NICU. Taylor still sticks to that give or take 15-30mins and is on 9am, 1pm, 5pm, 9pm, 1am. We have had real problems with Emilia with sickness, reflux and colic and have tried everything but have got her settled down a bit. She goes 3-4hrs through the day and evening I feed when she cried and 4hrs through the night. Their times are now out of sync with one another but its made it easier actually that they're not so close together and I do one, DH does the other. We do wake them if they're not awake. Its been really hard as we've had conflicting advice from midwives, health visitors and we still have NICU outreach come in twice weekly. I've been desperate but feel a lot better for reading through everyones posts that actually we're not doing too bad at all. I've also changed bottles 3 times and have now settled with Dr Browns anti-colic bottles which are amazing. Emilia was a slow feeder and would take 45mins to take 40mls but thankfully she's doing really well and has finally had a good weight gain this last few days as they'd been worrying about it. Her colic is also miles better so not so much distressing screaming in the evenings and through the nights. I suppose its just a case of finding out what works best for you and the babies. I've shed a lot of tears of frustration and utter tiredness. I'm so glad I'm not alone. xxxx

IUI-Mar07 / IVF-Jul07 / FET-Jan08 / IVF-May09 - ALL BFN
IVF-Jun10 - :BFP:



  • "aramass" started this thread

Posts: 1,026

Reg: May 9th 2009

Location: London

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7

Wednesday, March 2nd 2011, 1:05pm

The conflicting advice is a nightmare isn't it Geordie!! I was told however by a twin mum to go with the flow as much as possible as it'll just be more stressful if not so today we are routine free and they are napping and feeding on demand and I feel I'm giong to be paying the price later! We'll get there in the end I"m sure. We have to just remember they are still very little. Gen (my windy feeder) is on the Dr Browns Bottles but is now so slow she falls asleep and then wants feeding an hour later. It's sooo frustrating. Some of her wind has now translated into projectile vomiting. Maggie is on the Nuk bottles now and is now feeding too fast. I find feeding a nightmare. This morning I was feeding from 4 am until 8 am. Then the whole cycle started again half an hour later. It's so so so frustrating and had me sobbing to the sad lullaby emanating from the bouncy chair! I guess it's a matter of just sitting it out and waiting for the magical; 12 week mark when apparently it all comes together. x
Me: 37 Him: 42
Unexplained
IVF May 2010
:BFP: 10th June.
[zx076] [zx076]

my diary


Ros

Megastar

Posts: 9,046

Reg: Mar 14th 2008

Children: twin girls thanks to PGD!

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Wednesday, March 2nd 2011, 1:16pm

Awwww, I really feel for you Aramass, I promise it does get easier though. And then when it is easier you will wish you could experience your babies tiny and feeding all night again. I wish I could have a day with mine teeny again. It's so tiring at the time and you feel there is no end to the feeding and nappies, but you'll look back and feel so proud of yourself and cherish those times.
x
p.s. mine had NUK bottles, they still do, and they love them

After 5 years of endo surgery, clomid, 2 x MM/C, 2 x ICSI cycles and 1 PGD cycle,
beautiful twin girls born 8th Feb 2010, we are so grateful

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