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sasha146

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Thursday, August 25th 2016, 1:06pm

Dramatic 4yr old

Hi ladies

Looking for some advice, my ds is a very good boy the majority of the time and usually don't have many worries about him, he's a very sociable wee boy but God recently everything seems to be a drama in particular wearing shoes.

When he settles on a pair he likes that's all he will wear, even the mention of wearing another pair of shoes causes a major meltdown.

So this morning he said his trainers hurt so I'm assuming they are getting too small so I told him to put another pair on which he picked, but as soon as they were on all hell broke loose to the point he was almost sick.

I've taken him shoe shopping and let him pick shoes he likes, he's always happy in the shop but it's when we get home it's a different story.

My mum has now said she thinks there's something wrong with him (not sure what she's implying) which has got me worrying.

I'm hoping it's a phase but any advice would be appreciated.

X
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Net

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Thursday, August 25th 2016, 3:59pm

My DD is similar - she gets fixated on one thing to the point of obsession - shoes is actually one of them! She always wants to wear her shiny pink shoes but they are now a size 5 and she's a 6.5! We have hysterics and tantrums but I try to ignore them ( or if she's really bad she goes on the naughty step).

I do think this is normal behaviour for their age - anything for a bit of control I find - my DD does a few things to try and get the upper hand and choosing shoes and clothes is one of them. I definitely don't think there's anything wrong with him!

Xx
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Thursday, August 25th 2016, 4:27pm

Do you have any other concerns.
My 8, nearly 9 yr old started off like that. he has suspected aspergerz, but since we home educate our hildren, we dont feel the need to get him diagnosed/labelled.
I have just done 4 hrs of shoes ahopping. He hurt his big toe that required stitches at the weekend. as he will only wear wellies he is bousebound. so we have been looking all over for open toe sandals, ut each and every pair, his little toe was irritated on the strap. We settled for ugg boots
T-shirts are a problem if they have different patches (like leather) or the tags on the inside. He wont play games, he has to be in control too much. Wont stay in a room alone, 5he dog does a lot of babysitting. He wont use a toilet alone. Has massive phobias. These things have been there since he became mobile. He was also a slow walker, close to 20 months. Didnt crawl till 14-15 months.
Ive found that chastising or time outs dont work. I cant i.plement that as his phobias wpuod go sky high. Kindness, patienc3 and living within his control seems to help.
Shoes - complete nightmare. I tend to now buy the same shoes ie wellies in the size he is, then 1 size bigger and finally 2 sizes bigger. Thats the only way i can manage to him demanding walking barefoot everywhere. he also refuses socks .
if you suspect ASD, aspergers, autism, sensory issues, you can get your gp to refer for assessment.

dont know if ive helped, but hope it makes you feel better, knowing you are not alone
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sasha146

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  • "sasha146" started this thread

Posts: 1,752

Reg: Aug 13th 2011

Location: Scotland

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Thursday, August 25th 2016, 7:20pm

Thank you both, he's very good at socialising and making friends, great eye contact, loves interaction so I'm not concerned, I suspect it's just a phase and I give in too easy but although very independent on one hand quite insecure on the other although can play alone for a short time and enjoys games.
Clothes used to be a drama but now it's shoes, the ones he likes aren't an issue its just when you try and change them.

X
ME 30 DH 37

ICSI Oct 11 :BFP
bab11 July 12
FET Aug 14 BFN
FET Nov 14 BFN
What's next??

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