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  • "Suzy Q" started this thread

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Reg: Jul 30th 2006

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1

Sunday, February 17th 2008, 10:48am

Help!

The twins are 4 and a half months now and as much as they are great fun, giggly and smiley they are also much more demanding than they've ever been needing constant 1 on 1 attention to keep them happy a lot of the time. There are so many tears in the days that the three of us are home alone together and i'm finding it really draining. Can any one offer any advice??

We have a very loose routine: up at 7 down at 7 (always), feeds at 7.30, 11, 2.30, 5 and 6.30 and nap for ~an hour 9am ish and a couple of hours at lunchtime, they rarely have an afternoon nap although I know they need one as they are very fractious by 5pm. These feed and nap times are ideals and often fall by the wayside. At night we feed when they wake - anytime between 10.30 and 1am and C gets a 4am feed too.

I find it difficult to instigate a strict routine as half the time we're out and about and it's not practical - how can I train them to sleep for an hour in their cots at eg 3.30 pm when 4 days out of 7 we're out of the house. And the rest of the time they disrupt it themselves (gone are the days when one howls the other blissfully sleeps on!)

We've been very lucky up till now that they've been very easygoing kids, few tears, they've settled themselves at night, go down again quickly after a feed, played by themselves etc. I guess they are now more in tume with what they want and how to get it, I'm just wondering what I can do to make life easier for us all??

xxx
Me 35, DH 31 [zx075]
Bilateral hydrosalpinges discovered May 06
Bilateral salpingectomy June 06
1st IVF August 06 BFN
2nd IVF January 07 BFP Twins!!



lulu27

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Sunday, February 17th 2008, 11:07am

I would sat that due to their age they just want to do more stuff and maybe more of a stricter routine now may help. We were the same as you didn't really get them into a routine they did it themselves and we went with it. I hard a kind of rule at that age they they would need a nap after being up for about 3 hours. Now as well you have to start wearing them out so they sleep too. I would put them down at 09.30 and then they will wake for that 11am feed or maybe they would nap till 11.30, then have a playing session, toys on a play mat nursery rhymes cd on. Then I would do the 2.30 feed and then put them straight down for nap after that, I always associated milk with sleep even when they were having 3 bottles a day thaey went to bed after the 14.30 feed. I also found that I had to clip my wings a little at that age as they wanted more stimulation and didn't really ike being out all the time in their buggy, if I did want to go out i'd time it so they woud be in the car or buggy at nap time so would still sleep. Mine only nap from 10.30 till 12 now so if we want to do something we go out in the afternoons. Why dont you make the feed times stricter and keep to it then you'll know what your doing and your babies will also know what to expect whe and i'm sure will be happier. At your babies age mine were doing this

08.30 7 oz bottle
11.30 7 oz bottle
15.00 7 oz bottle with little spoons of pear/apple (was weaning at this age just started
17.00 Bath
18.00 7 oz bottle then bed Think they were napping after 11.30 feed and 15.00

xx

KIRSTY G

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Reg: Sep 27th 2006

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Children: 7 year old little man, and B/G twins

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Sunday, February 17th 2008, 11:39am

Suzy,
Definately agree that a stricter routine may help, especially around nap times ... The babies being tired is the main cause of tears in our house. Makes sense that they would need more attention if they're feeling a bit grumpy cos they're tired.

1xbaby sent me 'The contented house with twins' book which is great for stucturing routines with 2 babies.
Am happy to pass it on now, if you like? Just pm me your address and i'll pop it in the post tomorrow ...

xxx




  • "1xbaby pls" is no longer a member of FZ

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Sunday, February 17th 2008, 7:37pm

You could re start your rountine - it may mean having a week around the house so they can be put in there cot at the same times and get the pattern up and running -But once they see the pattern it shoul help. Mine know Lunch is before sleep in cot (for a good hour & half) Now they are yawming finishing there puddings.
How much Milk do they drink and what size bottle when.
You say that they have feed at 5 and agin 6.30pm
Maybe lessen the 5pm bottle to increase the 6.30pm bottle - hopefully that will see them a bit longer till solids at 6mths.

You could take up Kirsty's offer up (i liked the book in parts), read the book.See what you think. It may give you ideas x x

x x x
1st go ICSI - @ royal shewsbury and Telford NHS funded
25 eggs collected 27/3/06
15 fertilized - 8 grade A - 2 transfered 30th/3
test date - Thursday 13th April, BFP :D :D :D
:baby: ITS TWINS :baby:
M.L & J.F - Born 9/11/06 6w prem (6lb 5oz & 4lb 10oz)

  • "Suzy Q" started this thread

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Reg: Jul 30th 2006

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Sunday, February 17th 2008, 7:41pm

Cheers girls, Kirsty, thanks for the offer, I have the contented book which i tend to use as a reference of what I should be doing but haven't tried to emulate too closely... yet! Maybe a longer nap in the morning is required and the morning nap is one I should be able to insist on most days. We do have play with mummy time on the play mat with songs (generally in the afternoon) but recently they've been grumpy if they're not being held which is a bit tricky with two and i get stressed as i can't seem to give them both the attention they crave. It could well be because they're tired so sorting out some proper naps would help - I guess as C still wakes for a 4am feed I've not trained him to nap during the day hoping he'll sleep better at night if he doesn't have more kip than he seems to want during the day. I've never been the most organised of people but I guess trying to structure the day better should pay off!

Thanks again

xx
Me 35, DH 31 [zx075]
Bilateral hydrosalpinges discovered May 06
Bilateral salpingectomy June 06
1st IVF August 06 BFN
2nd IVF January 07 BFP Twins!!



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Sunday, February 17th 2008, 7:45pm

I agree a routine is needed, the most impottant thing is feeding times and bedtimes. I too was often out, but when i was in a let them settle themselves in there cots when tired. Controlled crying helps. Another thing i would suggest is a dream feed, this may help them to settle for longer through the night. My routine at this age was something like

7am bottle 8 0z

11am bottle 8 oz

3pm bottle 8 oz

6pm bottle 8 oz

I also was weaning at this point so they where having a few spoonfulls at 11 am, and also at 6pm. I think mine where sleeping through at this point, but when i did the dream feed i would do it around 10pm, seemed to help.

If they sleep better at night i find they are better in the day time :D
Mum of 3 year old twins.
Had ICSI worked first time


Life is like a box of chocolates, you never know what your gonna get!!



  • "Suzy Q" started this thread

Posts: 671

Reg: Jul 30th 2006

Location: London

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Sunday, February 17th 2008, 7:49pm

Thanks 1x, the only morning thing I can't live without is twins club on a tuesday (a life saver) - although its not on this week so it could be a good week to get at least a 9am nap sorted. Re milk, they're not great drinkers, they're offered 6oz but rarely finish it!
Me 35, DH 31 [zx075]
Bilateral hydrosalpinges discovered May 06
Bilateral salpingectomy June 06
1st IVF August 06 BFN
2nd IVF January 07 BFP Twins!!



  • "1xbaby pls" is no longer a member of FZ

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Sunday, February 17th 2008, 7:54pm

So do they have a 6oz at 5 and 6.30?
How much do they take of each?
x
1st go ICSI - @ royal shewsbury and Telford NHS funded
25 eggs collected 27/3/06
15 fertilized - 8 grade A - 2 transfered 30th/3
test date - Thursday 13th April, BFP :D :D :D
:baby: ITS TWINS :baby:
M.L & J.F - Born 9/11/06 6w prem (6lb 5oz & 4lb 10oz)

lulu27

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Sunday, February 17th 2008, 7:55pm

Mine have never been great milk drinkers, i'd offer 8 oz but even now they will only take what they want!!! I also found that sleep breeds sleep, sounds silly but the better they would nap in the day the better thay would sleep at night! xx

lulu27

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Sunday, February 17th 2008, 7:57pm

1 x baby i'm thinking that If it was me I would cut out the 5pm feed and then bring the 6.30 one to 6pm in the hope that they would take a full bottle, is that what you are thinking??

  • "1xbaby pls" is no longer a member of FZ

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Sunday, February 17th 2008, 8:04pm

Yup sure is. and then when established you can stage it on to 6.30 feed if you want.
1st go ICSI - @ royal shewsbury and Telford NHS funded
25 eggs collected 27/3/06
15 fertilized - 8 grade A - 2 transfered 30th/3
test date - Thursday 13th April, BFP :D :D :D
:baby: ITS TWINS :baby:
M.L & J.F - Born 9/11/06 6w prem (6lb 5oz & 4lb 10oz)

lulu27

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Sunday, February 17th 2008, 8:13pm

That's what i'd try too!!! xxx

  • "Suzy Q" started this thread

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Sunday, February 17th 2008, 8:42pm

Thanks girls, the 5pm feed is a settler as I try to get them to go from 2.30 to 6 -6.30 but it never works so I give them a feed at 5 to keep the peace, knowing that they'll have made room by 6.30 for some milk at bedtime. If I hold off till 6 they're so upset they feed badly, fall asleep before 6.30 then E is awake wanting to play before 6.30 the next day which is just too early for me! Its not been many weeks since we've moved from feeding every 3 hours to every 3 1/2 and as they're still not taking big volumes (often E wont take more than 2-3 oz for her first few feeds of the day (but her weight gains ok)) I like to cram another feed in if i can to up the daily intake.. I think I do need to review the times and start being a bit more consistant though so will give it a go!

Thanks for sharing your routine too diddle (sorry missed your post earlier).

xxx
Me 35, DH 31 [zx075]
Bilateral hydrosalpinges discovered May 06
Bilateral salpingectomy June 06
1st IVF August 06 BFN
2nd IVF January 07 BFP Twins!!



  • "1xbaby pls" is no longer a member of FZ

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14

Sunday, February 17th 2008, 8:56pm

Let us know how you get on, new ideas always wanted :D
1st go ICSI - @ royal shewsbury and Telford NHS funded
25 eggs collected 27/3/06
15 fertilized - 8 grade A - 2 transfered 30th/3
test date - Thursday 13th April, BFP :D :D :D
:baby: ITS TWINS :baby:
M.L & J.F - Born 9/11/06 6w prem (6lb 5oz & 4lb 10oz)

  • "Suzy Q" started this thread

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Reg: Jul 30th 2006

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Friday, February 22nd 2008, 8:39am

Hi

well 4 days in and routine is going ok (although E is asleep next door 30 mins ahead of shedule but after going 12 hrs last night and drinking a full feed this morning for the first time in months I didn't like to disturb her :innocent: )

Having 2 hours at lunchtime when they're down in their cots & I'm not at their beck and call is absolute bliss & making me a much saner mummy!

quick question, I'm finding it really hard leaving them crying it out when I put them down for their day naps, I know it's all new to them but they settle themselves at night. Will there come a time when they go down happily or is not not uncommon for them always to have a wail when they go down? My mum said they'll always have a cry but I was hoping they'd go down without fuss once they knew what to expect?
Me 35, DH 31 [zx075]
Bilateral hydrosalpinges discovered May 06
Bilateral salpingectomy June 06
1st IVF August 06 BFN
2nd IVF January 07 BFP Twins!!



kski

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Reg: Mar 26th 2006

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16

Friday, February 22nd 2008, 2:40pm

We've been very lucky up till now that they've been very easygoing kids, few tears, they've settled themselves at night, go down again quickly after a feed, played by themselves etc. I guess they are now more in tume with what they want and how to get it, I'm just wondering what I can do to make life easier for us all??


You seem to be doing ok -

They have weaning and teething coming soon - so any routine tends to get a little tested -

The dream feed works for us - and I am more willign to play " bad cop" and let them yelp a bit than DW -

They could be just having a growth spurt and are a bit fractious- -

It's all so Nebulous -

wish they could tell us what is going on !
DAD to twins

  • "1xbaby pls" is no longer a member of FZ

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Friday, February 22nd 2008, 3:35pm

My boys are establishedat going to bed at set ties mostly they go to seep ok but they stillhaveoff days I just revert to strict mama, In, lay them down (if sat up) an out.

Glad things are better x x
1st go ICSI - @ royal shewsbury and Telford NHS funded
25 eggs collected 27/3/06
15 fertilized - 8 grade A - 2 transfered 30th/3
test date - Thursday 13th April, BFP :D :D :D
:baby: ITS TWINS :baby:
M.L & J.F - Born 9/11/06 6w prem (6lb 5oz & 4lb 10oz)

  • "Suzy Q" started this thread

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Reg: Jul 30th 2006

Location: London

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18

Saturday, March 8th 2008, 2:11pm

Update

Thanks for all the advice. Life is much sweeter now we have a proper nap routine sorted. They have 3 naps a day during which time i can get on with things and just have some time out, and the rest of the time I'm dedicated to them - as i'm not trying to entertain them and do 10 other things at once we're all a lot less frustrated. They often still fuss for 5-10mins at nap times but not always and seem ready for their naps now.

so - many thanks! now we just need to crack those 4am feeds :innocent:

xxx
Me 35, DH 31 [zx075]
Bilateral hydrosalpinges discovered May 06
Bilateral salpingectomy June 06
1st IVF August 06 BFN
2nd IVF January 07 BFP Twins!!






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