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  • "ZIG" started this thread

Posts: 346

Reg: Oct 4th 2005

Location: Cumbria

Children: Isabella Mae (ICSI No.3) and Ruby Olivia (natural)

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Tuesday, January 17th 2006, 5:13pm

Why did nobody say it was so hard?!

Even now that Isabella is almost 5 weeks old, I'm still finding breastfeeding hard. My left nipple is very sore and my right one has good days and bad ones! I'm still detemined to continue, but have come to the conclusion that it wouldn't be the end of the world if I stopped breastfeeding. You are made to feel so guilty if you don't breastfeed, but nobody warns you how hard it really is. Yet my sis and a number of friends had no probs at all, latched on first time and not a cracked nipple in sight - I wonder what it is that makes it work for some and not for others?

So to everyone who is about to give birth, or struggling with the first few weeks of breastfeeding - even with the help and advise of a wonderful breastfeeding counsellor, it can be painful and can make you feel like a failure. Then you go and get your baby weighed and see that you're doing it right after all.

Good luck and don't forget to stock up on Lansinoh cream!

ZIG xxx
Me 38, DH 44. 2002-2004 2x ICSI's, 1x egg donation. Changed clinics for own eggs ICSI/tx no.4 - BFP 27/4/05! Mummy to Isabella after early c-section 15/12/05, due to LLP. Baby No.2 (huge 'natural' surprise!) Ruby Olivia arrived 29/09/07 via emergency c-section.



Posts: 93

Reg: Oct 3rd 2005

Location: "I dunno"

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Tuesday, January 17th 2006, 5:22pm

Yes Zig,
Breastfeeding is very hard and the baby doesnt always latch on and make it easy for us all ((if only)) :rolleyes:

With my DS, he was a very difficult baby, so hard infact that nipples were sore and cracked and he sucked like he was biting me.
keep going if you can, i gave up after 3 weeks or so, so you have done very well. In the end i do rememeber just giving him the breast at night...that worked a trea for me and him too as in the day the breast wouldnt satisfy him.
Happy Breastfeeding....
icsi - m/c 05
icsi bfp 2009 twins born nov 2009

Posts: 105

Reg: Oct 4th 2005

Location: UK

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Tuesday, January 17th 2006, 5:28pm

Yes it is hard but the pleasure when baby has put on weight because of what YOU have given.... well, its just great isnt it?!

I struggled a lot with my new baby (she has a super strong suck!) and the pain was terrible.

Reassure yourself that if you DO have to give up there ARE wonderful formulas out there and baby wont starve. Just by trying, even for a day, you have given your baby the best possible start in the world. Well done you!



  • "cookie" is no longer a member of FZ

Posts: 5,210

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Tuesday, January 17th 2006, 6:28pm

sweety you have done so well, i only managed 3 weeks also, and that was with nipple shields! ds was very awkward and he just couldnt get his head round it :rolleyes: dont give up hope hun, like pp said there are formulas out there that you could use. you are doing an amazing job! [zx127] xxxxx

I'm running down the road like loose electricity, while the band in my head plays a strip tease!



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Tuesday, January 17th 2006, 6:38pm

I think it must be Isabellas :rolleyes:

My first was a doddle but my second was a nightmare. I had thrush in my nipples that was undiagnosed and then very difficult to treat.

It started when I had been sore for weeks like you. I talked to the HV about it and we put it down to latching on and positioning. After a few months I still couldn't bear to even take my breastpads off as my nipples were so sore. I couldn't put the duvet over myself in bed and every feed brought tears to my eyes.

I talked to my HV again, she looked inside Izzie's mouth and said that she 'might' have thrush. I had to treat her with gel and my nipples with cream. Weeks passed and the pain was still there, I'd had mastitis by this point and had developed a stabbing pain deep in my breasts.

I read that thrush could spread to the milk ducts and spoke to my sister about it. She told her tutor at Uni (a midwife) who gave her the number of a lactation consultant from the Pennine area who specialised in thrush. My sister phoned her, the woman phoned me back and told me that I needed to take Canesten tablets (the kind that you would take for vaginal thrush) but that I needed ten times the recommended dose.... and that it wasn't licensed for breastfeeding mothers! :rolleyes:

I then went to my doctor and told her what the lactation consultant had advised, my doctor phoned her up and I had to agree to take responsibility for taking the drug.

I was prescribed the drugs and a week later, after almost 6 months of constant pain, I was able to feed without curling up my toes :D

It was worth it but BOY!!!! it was a bloody hard slog.

Zig, ask your MW or HV to check for thrush in Isabella's mouth and to check your nipples. The signs are blanching of the nipple when lightly pinched (the nipple looks like there's no blood in it), a white coating on Isabella's tongue or a very pink tongue, a deep stabbing pain deep inside your breast and/or pain throughout feeds (ie: it doesn't go at all).

If the nipple has been cracked or has been bleeding, then kept warm and moist then you have a prime breeding ground for thrush!

Good luck Zig, you're doing extremely well. Don't suffer, mither people, see your doc, phone your HV, phone La Leche, The NCT or any other support groups. It really shouldn't be hurting you at this point, there must be a reason behind it.




Tuesday, January 17th 2006, 6:44pm

I wished that i could have breast fed, but even with all the help and support that i got i couldn't do it!!

At least I've managed to express some to him even if it wasn't much!

I dont see myself as a failure and never will, and next time i have a baby (if its possible) I will definately try as hard as I have done again!

keep going hun and if you need to stop, then stop! no one will look at you any differently!

Jessica x x



Posts: 1,259

Reg: Oct 3rd 2005

Location: N Ireland

Children: One son, aged 8, daughter 1

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Tuesday, January 17th 2006, 6:46pm

It is terrible at times. I had an awful accident with the pump and lost nearly my entire layer of skin - man that was bad. Every time ds cried for food, I cried too at the thought of feeding him - but it really is worth it in the end whisky and glycerine works as long as you wash it off first! But lansinoh is better if you can get it. Hope you are ok Zig, Lol Lesa x
Keep smiling :happy:



Posts: 1,247

Reg: Oct 12th 2005

Location: just here.......

Children: now have little boy!

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Wednesday, January 18th 2006, 11:36am

Ah Zig bless you sweetheart> You're doing such a good job. Breast feeding is an amazing thing BUT it's Bl***y hard work and at times can frustrate, hurt, and make you be on the verge of tears. On the other hand it can be wonderful!! You've done so well to get this far- you need ahuge pat on the back !!!
as the others have said try and get as much advice and support as you can- and never let yourself feel like a failure if you do have to stop. YOU ARE A FANTASTIC MUMMY!! Make a decision that is right for you and your baby.
Good luck!!



Posts: 4,415

Reg: Oct 3rd 2005

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Wednesday, January 18th 2006, 12:02pm

Zig, I think that you have proved that you are far from a failure by persevering this long, many a woman (me included) would have given in at the first hurdle. Its fantastic that you are putting Isabella's needs before yours, and if you feel like you can carry on then don't let it defeat you. On the other hand I don't think you would be letting anyone down if it got too much and you decided not to continue. You have done really well to get this far. Only you can decide what is right for you 8)


4 baby angels, forever in our hearts


Posts: 621

Reg: Oct 3rd 2005

Location: Wales

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Wednesday, January 18th 2006, 12:22pm


I lasted 6wks on my first ds. He got so hungry my milk was too thin and I ended up putting him on the bottle.

My second ds wouldn't even latch on - the hospital made me try for 36-48 hrs and eventually gave me a bottle to give him.

I felt way less guilty giving second ds a bottle as you have to do what is best for the baby and if that's breast or bottle I'm sure you'll make the right decision.
Me 32, hypothyroid,
I have 2 beautiful boys 8 & 6, and one beautiful girl
1st ICSI - 15 eggs - Oct 05 - BFN
2nd ICSI - 22 eggs - egg sharer -Feb 2006 - BFN
I'm a single parent.

Posts: 2,291

Reg: Sep 27th 2005

Location: UK

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Wednesday, January 18th 2006, 6:36pm

Good on you Zig for persevering.

My midwife told me to allow 40 days and 40 nights before deciding whether to continue. She said it really can take that long for the breasts and the baby to sort themselves out, and so to decide to stop before that can mean that you give up when if you try just a bit longer it might work out. I remember a few weeks of pain and misery, but it was followed by months of pure enjoyment for DS and me and it was worth every bad day.

It really can get better, but if it doesn't, then at least you can rest assured you tried your best.

Had a total of three fresh IVF cycles and three frozen transfers (embryos and blastocysts)
m/c @ 11 weeks in 2007 DS1 and DS2 born from fresh IVF cycles :D

Posts: 2,792

Reg: Oct 1st 2005

Location: Wherever i lay my hat

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Wednesday, January 18th 2006, 8:02pm

Well done zig. It is difficult, S fed lovely and i could have fed her anytime but B was a super sucker, i kept a boob each for them but B made it so sore and cracked that i had to swap them over......poor S had to have the cracked one cause she hurt less!!

I found it difficult as obviously i couldn't really rest one of my breast!!! Plus they where not satisfied with breast alone.......i introduced bottle at about 3 weeks and did a bit of both untill approx 8 weeks, then they where so greedy they where on 8 oz bottles so i couldn't midwife said to me do not feel guilty as long as you try your best then that is all you can do. Take care and good luck. xxx
Mum of 3 year old twins.
Had ICSI worked first time

Life is like a box of chocolates, you never know what your gonna get!!



Posts: 56

Reg: Oct 3rd 2005

Location: Middlesbrough

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Thursday, January 19th 2006, 11:13am

Hi Zig

Yes I completely sympathise and understand - I think its the hardest thing I have ever done, and its taken an incredible amount of perseverance for me to get this far (3 weeks). I find its just something I really have to force myself to do.

I have pain that comes and goes but the main thing for me is the sleep deprivation - I'm just not coping with it. I've always needed a lot of sleep and I've not managed to cope with missing a night due to labour, andthe 5 nights in hospital, not to mention his regular and frequent nighttime feeds!

I resisted for ages, but we are now giving him one bottle late at night - DH does this to give me a bit of a chance to sleep. Unfortunately it hasn't worked out that he sleeps for longer, but at least its slightly easier on me.

I felt awful, but its given me another week, and now the thought of moving to bottles isn't as scary, as I've accepted its better if we are all happy rather than me being at the end of my tether!

I think its like ttc - some people fund it so easy, whilst others have to struggle on - familiar eh?

Good luck. Drop me a line if you fancy a moan.

Me - 34, DH - 35
TTC 2 yrs
First IVF started 11/03/05, amazing BFP 29/04/05 :D
Beautiful DS, born 29/12/05 [zx203]

Very surprising and unexpected (but fantastic) natural BFP 21/08/06 8o

Beautiful DS2, born 22/04/07 happydance

  • "londonchic" is no longer a member of FZ

Posts: 218

Reg: Oct 18th 2005

Location: surrey

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Saturday, January 21st 2006, 1:39pm

Its such a shame to hear of finding breastfeeding so hard- you will often see women who seem to find it no problem at all and others who are struggling. My nipples were cracked and sore for 6 weeks , I gritted my teeth throughout! It finally passed. I was told it was due to the baby not latching on properly. I think it depends on how much support you have from midwives/health visitors/breastfeeding counsellors, as well as the babys needs. Positioning is the key factor though.

Anyway the fact that you have fed for three weeks at the very least is great- Your baby will have plenty of antibodies and other goodness. Well done



  • "ZIG" started this thread

Posts: 346

Reg: Oct 4th 2005

Location: Cumbria

Children: Isabella Mae (ICSI No.3) and Ruby Olivia (natural)

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Sunday, January 22nd 2006, 8:48pm

Thanks girls - it feels good to know that I'm not the only one who has suffered (which is a horrible thing to say, but you know what I mean...!). I have started to give Bella 1 bottle at night, which gives my boobs a bit of a break. Things are slowly improving, although it sounds to me that we may both have thrush, if Bells' diagnosis is correct. She has a white coating in her mouth and my nipples are 'white' at the ends. I'll book a visit to my HV this week and we'll take it from there.

As for sleep deprivation, Bookworm, I know what you mean! We had 5 unbroken hours 2 nights ago and I woke in a panic and had to check she was still breathing!! I have to point out that Bella is a once-every-2-hours kinda girl, so 5 hours was a miracle! And I have found that if I have more than 4 hours a night I feel even worse during the day.. it's amazing what you can get used to. Thank God for my fantastic dh, who takes over when I get frazzled.

Hooray for the zombie look! Sleep is sooooo last year!
ZIG xxx
Me 38, DH 44. 2002-2004 2x ICSI's, 1x egg donation. Changed clinics for own eggs ICSI/tx no.4 - BFP 27/4/05! Mummy to Isabella after early c-section 15/12/05, due to LLP. Baby No.2 (huge 'natural' surprise!) Ruby Olivia arrived 29/09/07 via emergency c-section.




Sunday, January 22nd 2006, 9:38pm

PMSL I agree ZIG its the start of a new trend! ;)

DS scared the c**p out of me too the other day, he was crying whilst I was on the loo, (I had to pay a rather urgent long call) and after about 5 mins he stopped crying! and when I went downstairs he was just staring upwards without blinking!

I tell you if I hadn't have previously relieved myself there would have been a big mess to clear up! ;) :p

Jessica x x

  • "victoria82" is no longer a member of FZ

Posts: 1,641

Reg: Oct 5th 2005

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Sunday, January 22nd 2006, 10:25pm

hi zig

have you try using honey and glutin, you pour it into a cotton wool and clean your baby tongue with. they sell it at boot. it stop they from getting thrush. or just use water and cotton wool everyday to clean the tongue with.

i agree with you there that sleep is so last year. when eliana DD was born she wake up every 3 hour for her feed at night. now since 2 weeks now she will sleep from 9pm to 4am and get up for her feed and then every 3hr after. ;) ;)we are enjoying this. i just hope i havent talk too soon :D


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Reg: Sep 27th 2005

Location: UK

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Tuesday, January 24th 2006, 8:04pm

Bookworm - my DH gave my DS a bottle late in the evening, but it was milk that I had expressed during the day. I used to collapse into bed at 9.30pm and manage to sleep until 2.30am when the next feed was due, but I felt better with those 5 hours than only 3. If you can express a bit after each feed during the day, you should end up with enough for the late evening feed. That way you can keep DS 100% breastfed for longer. However, with time, as you say, you can feel more accepting of giving formula.
Had a total of three fresh IVF cycles and three frozen transfers (embryos and blastocysts)
m/c @ 11 weeks in 2007 DS1 and DS2 born from fresh IVF cycles :D