I've been back to work a week now and hated every second of it. I've gone back four days, as unfortunately finances dictate that I have no choice and DS is in nursery. I cried my eyes out most of the week and found it very very hard dropping him off. I think the worst thing is the length of time in the day (he's there from 8 til 5 each day) - it just feels too long. I think if I could do three days, it would feel like a better balance. We probably could just about manage financially if I did three days, but my employer won't hear of it (I had to fight to get the four days). I'm looking around for other work, but am a customer service manager and similar part time jobs don't seem to exist. We have no family who can help out either.
I think its the hardest thing I've ever had to do. I miss him so much and although everyone tells me it will get better in time, it just doesn't feel like that now. We went through so much to get this little man and handing him over to other people to look after just feels so wrong. His first week was a bit tough for him to as he is teething and really struggled to settle. Not only that, I've always had problems getting him to nap during the day and its only in the last few months that he now naps well in the dark, in his cot with his music on. Well, I didn't think of this at the time, but the cots at nursery are in the same room and there's absolutely no way he will sleep. He's come home having had about 20 minutes all day and gets so cranky and upset if he doesn't sleep. By the time I pick him up he is totally beside himself cos he's just soo tired.
Anyway, I'm hoping someone will tell me I'm just being daft and that we will both be absolutely fine??????
Debi x