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mrsjasper

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Tuesday, October 11th 2011, 7:31am

Sweets

DD1 started school this time and since she started she has come home at least once a week with a packet of haribos that someone has brought in because it's their birthday. I hate this. She does have sweets, I am not precious about it, but haribos are full of colourings and other junk. Plus I don't want her having them this often, so I have to put them away and hope she forgets about them, which she doesn't so then we have a disagreement about her not having sweets so often. Plus it's her birthday soon and I do not want to buy bags of sweets for dozens of kids I don't know. Am I being mean? If anyone has any suggestions for alternatives I could send in then please let me know, my plan was just not to bother! At the moment I still have a small amount of control over what she eats when I'm not there and and I want to keep it or as long as possible. :cross:

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Tuesday, October 11th 2011, 7:53am

In my friends party bags she put a few Percy pigs in and some of those natural flavoured sweets in. And then for another bag she put just stuff to do so a balloon, bubbles, some random plastic rubbish off the intent etc.

Don't think you're being mean or unfair at all.






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Blue

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Tuesday, October 11th 2011, 8:14am

Did you know that Percy Pigs contain real pig?
It's the gelatine.
But at least it's real!

I'm with you Mrs J. We have so little time to influence what they eat and there is just nothing good at Haribo at all. For the party bags, I think it would be nice to have just a few "nice treats", but mainly toys as Flic says. M&S might do some nice individually wrapped sweets / biscuits, and if they are biggish, you only need to include one. Or Cadburys do little bags of chocolate biscuits, like Cadburys fingers or jaffa cakes. We keep an emergency stash of this kind of thing in our buggy (for when we have run out of grapes/raisins/bananas) to divert the girls from rare but nightmareish tantrums, how bad is that... :O

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Tuesday, October 11th 2011, 11:53am

That's fine Blue, we all do that and it's not the party bags at the actual party, it's the stuff at school. It's just ridiculous. And I would be wary if sending gelatine based sweets for that reason, I'm not aware of any Muslim children at school but I know there are definitely kids with allergies so it's not worth the hassle.

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Tuesday, October 11th 2011, 1:32pm

is it really mean to not send anything at all for school? when did that all start, anyway? Sounds like one child started it and now every parent feels obliged to do the same so that their child isn't left out...I can see how that could happen. What do other mums think about it all? is it very stingy to just give them one celebrations size milky way each? At what point in the day and how are these sweets being dished out - by the birthday child in class or the playground?


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mrsjasper

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Tuesday, October 11th 2011, 1:52pm

Now then Jen, if I was to get a box of celebrations and send in a milky way for each child, there would then be the thorny problem of what to do with the rest of the box! Hmm, this needs careful consideration... thinkthink thinkthink thinkthink

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Tuesday, October 11th 2011, 2:18pm

OMG, when did kids start taking sweets in on their birthday? It all comes down to peer pressure doesn't it? So far I have vowed I will never bow to it but I'm not there yet! How about a few home made mini muffins, the really small, bite sized ones? Although I expect you aren't allowed to take home made cake into school any more are you...................................






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Tuesday, October 11th 2011, 2:26pm

Oh Mrs J, sorry I misread. I had never heard of kids taking in sweets to school because it's their birthday. Jeez.

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Tuesday, October 11th 2011, 8:09pm

MMM... Can i comment??

As a teacher we are getting an increasing amount of sweets brought in - it causes no end of arguments as children say i don't want that one or this one or what ever - so i generally leave them at the back of the classroom till the end of the day and make the children say thank you to the person who brought them in and then leave it to the parent to decide if they can have the sweets or not!

As for cakes - now they are the teachers favourite!! LOL but we don't give out homemade cakes! - You can never tell what is in them!

And no there is no stigma to not taking things in!! Stop the trend is what i say :D But if you do feel the need to then hard (not chewy) lollipops are usually the easiest as they are suitable for all!

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mrsjasper

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Tuesday, October 11th 2011, 8:45pm

Thanks for that Rico, useful to know. Never thought about homemade cakes being such an issue, I had toyed with the idea of homemade biscuits, but I suppose you cant give this out either. And i must disagree about the lollipops, if DD gets those, they get immediately confiscated as I don't want her soaking her teeth in sugar solution for the length of time it takes to eat one of those. DH says I am being mean and if she is the only one not taking something in she might get teased. Well it's tough I'm afraid. I'm not the only mum that thinks this way. No sweeties at school on her birthday.

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Tuesday, October 11th 2011, 9:41pm

I'm with you - i don't like them having anything in school - so i always let the parent decide!

And i don't think you are being mean! Kids soon forget - i wouldn't worry about not sending things in.

And no sorry we wouldn't allow homemade biscuits either - shop bought things are ok - except for the excess sugar etc!

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Wednesday, October 12th 2011, 2:56pm

My friends (a different one) daughter came home from school with Harribo and she went mad at the school beacuse they were giving them sweets but yet in her pack up she wasn't allowed any!!

If I was a child I would be far more interested if instead of coming home with sweets after school I came home with a little toy of some sort!! Now that would change the other mums ideas and make them feel bad for giving out cheap sweets when you are giving out little toys! And you can batch buy on ebay and stuff!!






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Wednesday, October 12th 2011, 6:55pm

I would be tempted to say something to the school. My LO isn't at school yet but I understand that there is lots of focus on healthy eating and guidlines on what their packed lunches contain. I plan to only give DS sweets occasionaly as a special treat and things like this really wouldn't help me keep it as a treat!


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Sunday, October 16th 2011, 3:19pm

I would be tempted to say something to the school. My LO isn't at school yet but I understand that there is lots of focus on healthy eating and guidlines on what their packed lunches contain. I plan to only give DS sweets occasionaly as a special treat and things like this really wouldn't help me keep it as a treat!


What she said!!

Our school sent a letter home a few years ago saying that folks weren't allowed to send in stuff for birthdays and that was the end of that. It wasn't as if everyone was doing it, just a few children here and there but enough to cause hassle because the Mums obviously didn't want the pressure of sending stuff in and the recipients Mothers were feeling like you.

I'd speak to a few parents in the playground and then approach the school or collar a governor. I wouldn't be thrilled if our school had this policy and with all the hassle we have about packed lunches and break time 'healthy snacks' it's hypocritical of them not to follow up your concerns.... especially you being an experienced senior nurse!

mrsjasper

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Sunday, October 23rd 2011, 8:57am

Well I stood firm and sent in nothing, but because itsthelast day of half term they all got a lollipop. From the teacher! X(

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Tuesday, November 1st 2011, 2:55pm

I think this sweets in school thing is outrageous - it takes away parental control over diet. I would voice my concerns with the school because its against all the healthy eating stuff they are supposed to adhere to. My daughter doesn't start school until next year but is at a pre-school attached to the school she will go to and they have a strict water only, no juice and no sweets policy. Some children take a birthday cake in on their birthday in the pre-school but I would say that is the minority.

I would be really unhappy with my daughter having sweets in school. We let her have sweets at birthday parties, on Halloween and I expect we will on Christmas Day but that is it. She didn't even try sweets until the classic Haribo in the pass the parcel situation at a party about 6 months ago and I felt my hand was forced then - because all the other kids were opening the sweets and eating them.

I'm sure people think we are mean but I worked very hard to make sure my daughter had a fantastically healthy diet from the second she started on solid food (and before with exclusive breastfeeding) and brushes her teeth thoroughly - she can choose what she eats when she's an adult but I plan to deliver her into adulthood with a healthy body and perfect teeth. That's my job as a mum and having school screw that up is just wrong in my book!

glad you stood firm and didn't send in sweets Mrs.J - i would raise the issue with the school and I'm sure plenty of other mums will thank you.
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